dear lego employee

Dear Lego Employee aka "nicola" (see comment on day 13 as reference),

Thank you for your unbiased review of your product, my parenting skills, and my overall "magical" use of the English language.

Please be advised that when I referred to my husband as "insane" (see day 13 blog as reference), I did not mean it in the medical or legal sense of the word. He is a very good father and is overall confused how he got dragged into your review. I have submitted a formal apology his way for suggesting such unfit parenting skills as you so clearly pointed out.

Now, may I take this time to thank you for becoming a follower of my controversial blog. I'm so happy to have you. I know my future "magic" words will bring you ample critiquing, to which I looked forward to.

I know your company puts a suggested age for each Lego set, which up to this point we have ignored. Jack has been putting his own Legos together for some time now... and can you believe he doesn't fall under the suggested age! Blasphemy! When I help my younger son though, which you so strongly discouraged, I thought we were having a bonding moment. We both seemed to be having a good time. I didn't know I was doing such a disservice. What a freeloader I have been raising. That will change, don't you worry!

I will also let both boys know that I am not letting them get off easy anymore. I didn't know I could ask my kids to clean up after themselves? What a novel concept. You have opened my eyes and I see the light! Even the 9 month needs to start pulling his own weight I'd say.

I apologize when I disgusted you with my description of how "sick" I was to find out the value of one Lego set. But let's both be honest. Your product has gotten pretty pricey over the years - and can you imagine how many other Lego boxes we would have purchased for Jack for the price of the one Batman set?

I see now, my so called magical words were confusing to you... I was not literally sick, mentally or physically. I was just amazed that such a small box could have produced so many other boxes at the same price that he would have equally loved and adored. I forget words can mean several things. I will take your advice with my future blogging and use my words more carefully. Especially now that I know people, whom I do not know, somewhere out in the internet universe, are taking them so literally and judging me over every line. You should be commended for being able to call me such a bad mother with such grace and ease and without any way of me to know who you are, or see your own blog.

Tune in next week when I discuss how I hate letting my children open their own bananas because of the way it smashes the top into banana goop that makes me gag a little. Imagine all the lost moments of invested child dexterity on that one!

Yours sincerely,
me